Happy hour.

Having a child really messes with your social life. I'm sure someone has mentioned this to you before if you haven't already experienced it yourself. I think I was still in denial when I was pregnant with my son, Charlie. I was twenty-nine and my husband and I were living in Brooklyn, so the bar scene was still pretty central to our social life. I remember going to bars with my husband and our friends on the weekends, drinking seltzer water and quickly realizing that bars when you are not drinking are (surprise!) not the most fun. They're usually too loud, you often can't sit down or have a normal conversation. I remember thinking, just wait - only six more months before I get to enjoy beer and going out to bars again! Little did I know that I would never go to a bar again. This is not entirely true, but almost.

Of course, there were times when Charlie was very little that we smuggled him into a child-friendly bar while he napped on my chest or in his car seat and his exhausted parents got to enjoy a drink or two with friends. Then there was this point right around nine months when Charlie was definitely NOT OKAY with sitting quietly anymore and wanted to be constantly moving, crawling, and climbing. Taking him to a place where the sole purpose was to sit and try to have a conversation with friends was a lesson in futility that we learned to avoid. Occasionally we did spring for a babysitter, but these nights were often reserved for going out to dinner, alone - another luxury that you learn to savor with kids.

It helps immensely that when we moved to Oakland many of our friends here had also just had a kid or were pregnant or planning on having kids soon. So, we've learned to adjust. We meet for hikes during the day or host afternoon barbecues. But the most brilliant idea has really been the revitalization of happy hour.

I cannot take credit for its revival - it was good friends of ours who also have a toddler who started suggesting it - but I will say that it has added to my overall happiness. It's a golden couple of hours between getting home from work on a Friday around five or six and putting little ones down for the night, usually around seven thirty or eight (when we can't tear ourselves away from good conversation).

When we're too busy, we meet up with friends at an outdoor bar that allows kids. And when we have a little more time, and a pile of new CSA vegetables nagging us to make something before we go bad, we host at our house with something to keep the beer from going straight to our heads. And let's be honest, aren't all the best foods really appetizers? Cheeses and nuts and breads and finger-foods and all that is good?

This baba ghanoush was inspired by a pile of eggplant that keeps arriving from our CSA and a bottle of tahini which I had purchased for another recipe and still hadn't opened. My favorite way to eat eggplant is still the kind that comes soaked in oil at Chinese restaurants, but I have yet to master that dish at home. Baba ghanoush is a close second. I like my baba ghanoush to taste like eggplant and the most important aspect for me is texture - light and airy. I followed David Lebovitz's recipe for the most part, but I didn't notice any smokey flavor from the charring of the eggplant that he recommends, and I didn't miss it. I also backed down on the garlic and omitted the parsley and chili powder. Overall, I was very pleased with the eggplant flavor that came through  the layers of lemon, salt, and garlic. The texture was dreamy.

The dates wrapped in bacon are a popular party food that are stuffed with Parmesan in this recipe, but I've seen other recipes for dates stuffed with goat cheese, ricotta, and blue cheese. I also think you could omit the Parmesan and not miss much (heresy, I know), as the bacon offers more than enough savory to balance the sweet dates. I like them with toothpicks which I ran out to the store to purchase and then managed to drop on the dining room floor on my way to the kitchen. Luckily, Charlie was happy to pick them up behind me and was about to stick one in his ear when my husband walked in. It's still amazing to me how someone so tiny is able to narrow in on arguably the worst possible place to insert a sharp stick in a mere matter of seconds. Man, he's the best.

Baba ghanoush
Adapted from David Lebovitz

1 large or 2 medium sized eggplants
1/4 cup tahini (I finally found this at Whole Foods after trying both Trader Joe's and Safeway)
2 tbsp freshly squeezed lemon juice (about 1 1/2 lemons)
3/4 tsp coarse salt
1 clove garlic, peeled and smashed
1 tbsp olive oil

Preheat oven to 375 degrees. Wash eggplant and prick skin several times. Roast on cookie sheet for 25-35 minutes depending on size of eggplant until completely soft. You should be able to insert a sharp knife without resistance.

Let cool until able to handle easily. Split in half and scrape meat into food processor, discarding skins. Add remaining ingredients except oil and blend for 10-20 seconds until smooth. Taste for additional salt or lemon juice and add if necessary. Transfer to small serving bowl and drizzle with olive oil. I served with grilled bread, fresh tomatoes and a hunk of hard, salty cheese, but toasted pita bread would also work wonderfully. Will keep for up to several days in the fridge.

Bacon-wrapped dates with Parmesan
Adapted barely from The A.O.C. Cookbook

32 deglet noor dates, pitted (I thought these would be hard to find, but I bought a Sunkist bag at Safeway)
32 3-inch, thinly sliced pieces of bacon
4 oz Parmesan cheese, cut into 1/4 x 1/4 x 1/2-inch pieces

Preheat oven to 400 degrees. Stuff cheese pieces into each pitted date and wrap tightly with bacon slice. Place on large cookie sheet or roasting rack. Bake for 12-15 minutes or until crisp.

Insert toothpicks and serve immediately on large platter or cutting board. Beware of toddler hands.